To give 2017 a good start I have taken part in the lovely Geraldine from Over Heaven’s Hill In Conversation With Series. Being a new year she has a new set of questions and what fabulous questions they are too! Here are all my answers, you can also find the interview on Geraldine’s blog along with all the other Conversations she has done.
How would your parents have described you?
They would most likely say I was independent. Well I know my mum would anyway. I was the eldest of four, which meant I often had to do things by myself. I wanted to go to a kids club when I was little but it was held in a room above a shop, there was a huge flight of stairs to go up (well it seemed huge to me). My youngest brothers are twins so mum couldn’t just carry them, my other brother and the pushchair up the stairs to go with me, so if I wanted to go I had to go alone. I did go; it is where I first leant to do a plait.
Did you enjoy being pregnant?
Nope! I hated it both times. First time around I had pretty bad nausea until I was about 18 weeks. If I was lucky it wouldn’t start until the afternoon or evening but mostly it was an all day thing. I was sick at least once daily for most of those weeks. Then at 30 weeks I was admitted to hospital because I was struggling to walk with the pain in my pelvis. Turns out I had SPD or Pelvic Girdle Pain as it is now called. My maternity care for this was shocking and I wasn’t offered any help or support for another 8 weeks by which point I had hit rock bottom with the daily pain. I was finally given a support belt and crutches which helped me move again. Once Pinky was born the pain went away which was amazing. Second pregnancy I was less sick but the SPD kicked in at 14 weeks. By the third trimester I could barely walk even with crutches. Every step I took I could feel my pelvis moving and grinding against itself. We are not having a third child!
What was the hardest part about being pregnant?
For me it was the SPD. The daily pain is really hard to deal with and stay positive, especially when you can’t take painkillers like you usually would.
What is the one thing you never had that you want for your kids?
As harsh as this is going to sound I want them to have a happy home. I was loved as a child but I don’t ever remember my parents being happy together. I have almost no memories of the both of them together. I know much of that is because they were working to keep us fed and clothed, and I know they did the best for all of us that they could but the home wasn’t a happy one.
What do you miss about your life before you had kids?
I miss ‘me time’ the most. I have always needed time by myself to reset after a busy week at work. I am very comfortable in my own company but I just don’t get any time anymore. Some days it can feel like I haven’t even been able to form a full thought without being interrupted.
What is the best thing about being a parent?
The love. There is nothing like it! They love me and I love them so much. They may drive me crazy sometimes and I may beg my Husband to take them out for a bit, but I wouldn’t be without them!
What advice would you give your younger self?
It is ok to need help. I got so used to being the independent one I often didn’t recognise when I needed help and support, even before I became a mum. My husband has been really good at helping me realise I don’t have to carry all of life’s burdens by myself. He is my rock now and has helped me through many things over the years we have been together.
You’re in the store with a full cart and your baby starts crying frantically…what do you do?
I probably carry on whilst giving them a cuddle. The cart would never be too heavy to push one handed because I only do online shopping. I may need to go and get extra milk or bread in the week but I never ever do a big shop in the store. I haven’t done since I had kids because the fear of this situation ever happening was enough to make me not go!
Good luck with your novel Geraldine. I hope you get it all done before your baby arrives.